Tuesday, June 30, 2009


I'm a loon.

Last time I was sitting on the fountain of Valletta, and it was a bit windy and the water of the fountain was spraying on my back. It was such a nice feeling, only that the water is rather dirty as you might have realized. But...I couldn't care less. I just sat there whilst looking at people hassling about it and trying to cover their hair from the beautiful spray. And I was there...sitting with my hair blowing in the breeze and getting wet, and loving it xD

Anyway since I had nothing better to do than wait (as it was what I was doing in the first place) I started writing down some things which make me happy and I came up with these:

1. Little children blowing bubbles and then running after them
2. Laughing out loudly without caring
3. Remembering something funny in a quiet place full of people and muffling the laugh
4. Having a warm shower and getting into bed after a day at the beach
5. Sleeping knowing you don't have to wake up early the next day
6. Somebody smiling back at you when you smile at them
7. Being able to content myself from these silly things ><

Toodles and smiles :)

Sunday, June 21, 2009

My room is starting to form. My character is starting to be instilled and, I'm finally starting to feel comfortable in Bugibba :D Why this sudden comfort? My brother started my first drawing on my wall. :)

You see I usually always have some form of drawing on my wall, as you can imagine. Whoever knows my brother, and mother for that matter knows why. My brother- the artist, my mother- the 'it's ok, as long as it remains in your room' :) Hence, my first drawing of the many to come in my room :)

Friday, June 19, 2009

New book

I remember reading my brothers blog about a new chapter in his life and I remember thinking how scary it was to start a new chapter, to leave all the rest behind and to keep going strong for the rest of the book.

Well I turned the page and found it's the end of the book. I'm starting a new one. The last one was amazing, there are no words to explain it..Honestly, It was a very happy 2 years of my life. To stop using metaphors, cause I'm rather tired to keep it going...many things have changed and are still changing. me and mike are no longer a couple. It's a funny feeling, and I can't believe it. We still see each other a lot, being in the same community and everything. Today we were pondering on how funny Christian break ups are. You don't pass through the normal steps of a break up: denial, realisation, despair, regret, eagerness to fill the void, regret again (this part could be recurring) and then okness. It's more like: feel a void, fill it with God, smile and be friends. I'm not saying there aren't feelings involved because I must say this hurts a lot, but there's something different. I suppose that's what we mean when we say we have God's joy...it's eternal, it remains no matter what.

In my new book (metaphor's back), there is chaplaincy. :) I never thought I would be so comfortable with new people so quickly. The people there are pretty awesome, and honestly, studying has never been more fun. I also love the way love shows through them all, in the sense that it's like one big family..makes me happy :D

Intercession is doing great. I love the togetherness there too. Meeting a lot of new people all of a sudden, which is really awesome. Summer is starting very nicely indeed :)

I also want this to be a new start where my relationship with God is on a new level. For these past 2 years I have never been on the road with God alone. Now I am, and I think it's gna be a blast hehe. I want to go deeper with Him, and I want to play for Him alone, I want to sing for Him alone. :)

Thats about it for now,

Bring on the change...in small gentle doses if you don't mind :)

Van :)

Saturday, June 6, 2009

I am very happy to say: One to go :D Finally, these exams drained me of all sanity, and deprived me of a lot of food too.. :S Finally enough though, these exams haven't drained me of happiness. I've been studying at chaplaincy for these past week I think, and I must say I am very happy indeed. It feels very nice to share the stresses of a students life with other people who are passing through the same thing. And the good thing is, it's not even shared with moaning and groaning, but rather through smiles and 'ejja l-ahhar ftit's. So I am a happy chick ><

Although everything is good with my 'social' life, if you want to call it that, My head has been turned upside down and is still trying to function normally. It's not really the exams, more.....I don't know...my confusion. Confusion and me were going out in 6th form, but I thought we broke up for good, and I never wanted to see him again. However he returned begging for forgiveness...and silly me took him back. And now, he's here to stay he says. Problem is I hate this feeling. I feel like I don't know what I want anymore...ekk like every area of my life is at that point where I have to decide something, and I don't know what it is. Bleh, I want it to go now. I want to have a happy care free summer not a pensive one. Ehh...God knows.

On the bright side this can finally happen: